Zane Zane Mary Jane and other nonsense.

I just had to post some of Zane's funny statements before I forgot them. The boy is a riot.

Today he spotted a fly buzzing around our bedroom. I grabbed the fly swatter, and he said, "Here mom, give me that." So I handed it over. The next time I came in the room he said, "Mom, I was gonna get that fly with this, but he was camouflaged." HE'S 3!!! I just was not expecting that word to come out of him.

At bed time, Olivia came in and said, "Mom, can I have a p-e-a-c-h?" spelling it out. Zane said, "Mom, tan I have a E-T-O?...Can I have vat?" Sure Zane.

The other day, I asked him who his best friend was in nursery. He said, "Um, my teacher...I wub my teacher." Awwwww. And then he went swimming this evening with mom and dad. Of my 3 kids, he is the least dare-devilish. He ventured out to the deep end (with his water wings). And while he was "swimming" around he said, "I'm gonna tell my nursery teacher that I was swimming in the deep water!" I'm so grateful for wonderful nursery leaders that make him LOVE church AND the gospel.

We went to the doctor Wednesday and as we were leaving he asked, "MOM, aren't we going to get that baby out of your tummy?" It's going to be a long 7 months for that little guy. He claims the baby is a boy, and I think he's right. (Poor Olivia). Someone tell me that sisters are not all they're cracked up to be! I didn't have any growing up, so I guess she can do without them too. I do believe this will be our final addition. But, who knows, maybe Heavenly Father has a different plan.

Oh, and about that. I found out I was pregnant on Friday the 13th of May. I'm hoping that's not a bad omen. I'm feeling pretty good about this time around and at the same time, feeling pretty rotten (sick, that is). BUT I don't feel as sick as I did last time, yet. That's what leads me to believe that it's a boy. I get REALLY sick with girls.

Speaking of girls, I don't quite know what to do with mine. Anybody have any advice? Her emotions are ALL-OVER-THE-PLACE. I know this is common, but I guess I just thought I had a few more years before it would begin. One minute, she will do what I ask her to, no complaints, no attitude, and the next she is the most defiant little devil known to man. I just keep praying that I don't kill her. I really don't want to give birth in prison. I just keep praying that she and I can compromise and TRY to see eye to eye. I DO love her and WANT to be a good mom, but sometimes she makes it hard.

There's a crazy woman on the loose at WalMart!!! (and it's not me)

So this morning I went to WalMart to pick up a few things. Zane always likes those ridiculously HUGE shopping carts with the two plastic seats on the back, so I got one for him (because he's spoiled). I then commenced to clean the handles off using the antibacterial wipes that WalMart provides at the front of the store. This little old lady pulls up next to me in her powered cart (and don't be thinking "Aw, a little old lady how cute"-because she was NOT nice). She said to me, "Why do you do that?" I replied, "To get rid of the germs."
She said, "Well that's just SILLY. You wipe that off, then you go around the store and pick up packages. You don't wipe THEM off when you pick them up. Maybe you should take your little wipe and carry it all over the store and wipe your meat packages and everything else off with it."
I didn't know what to say, so I said, "Well, I guess I'm just STUPID! Thank you for pointing that out."
Then she says, "Well, I didn't say that, I just said it's SILLY."

You know what I think is silly? A person who doesn't know when to mind their own business.

The thing is, HUNDREDS of people do not handle every item in the store. Hundreds of people DO push those little carts around. How stupid would I look if I wiped everything that I pulled off the shelf before placing it in my cart.

I saw the little old woman a little later and exclaimed "There she is!" and I'm thinking that if looks could kill she would be dead right now. She was in my way, and I was surprised that she actually got OUT of my way when she saw me. Maybe she felt a little remorse for the way she acted. I wish that I didn't let a little thing like this bother me so much, but it seems like stupid people always want to target ME. Does anybody else feel this way?

Ok, I'm all better now. Thanks for letting me vent. The thing is I'm already a nervous wreck today, and I'll tell you why later....maybe. I'm not feeling well, and I'm tired on top of my anxiety. I just need to remember that she is a Child of God, and maybe she really doesn't have anything better to do than point out people's faults (even though I don't feel that wiping my cart is a "fault")

The end.

*/*/*/*/FAIRIES/*/*/*/*

The other morning Greg came to me, and pointing to his feet said, "Look!"
I didn't know what I was looking at..."My socks are mismatched. You put two different socks together when you were folding laundry. You probably did it on purpose too. Didn't you?"
I replied that I had NO idea what he was talking about and that, in fact, I am NOT the one who does the laundry. It is the Laundry Fairy who does the laundry. She washes, dries, folds, hangs, and puts away EVERYBODY's laundry and NOBODY stops to think what a big job this is and NEVER, EVER says thank you.

A little while later, he texts me (from work) a picture of his shoes. I had bought them at a garage sale and they LOOKED brand new. But, they were falling apart. His message read, "Thanks for the shoes! They have REALLY held up GREAT!"

I wrote back, "Oh, that was the Shoe Fairy who bought those. Those are nice, you are lucky. I will have to ask her if she can bring you another pair."

Then he texts again, "Can she bring me some lunch while she's at it?"

"I'll have to ask the Lunch Fairy if she is willing to do that."

Greg texts, "Only if she wears her wings and brings her dust."

Me: "She'll do what she can. She always does. Even though nobody appreciates her for it."

Greg: "Oh....that gives me heart burn."

A little later. "thank the cook fairy for the delish lunch. I'll be home by 5"

Me: "The chef fairy says thanks for telling her, now she knows when to have Supper ready."

Greg: "You seem well connected to the fairy crowd. Can a certain fairy make a visit tonight?"

NO. She says she is too tired from doing all this work. Plus I think she has a headache.

Oh how he will kill me if he finds out I posted this.

Olivia

I know I put this picture on facebook, but this photo is just pretty much Olivia so I thought I would share it here as I talk about my eldest (craziest) child.

On the way to church this afternoon, Olivia said, "Mom, do you know why we don't like papa's kisses?"
"Why?"
"Because Papa's lips are slimy."
Then Noah has to give his 2 cents, "Because Papa is Stinky!"
Then both of the kids told me not to tell papa that they said that about him. They said, "You can put it on facebook since papa doesn't have facebook, but just tell grandma not to tell him when she reads it."

Then on the way home from church we were talking about some of the neighbor kids. We said how much we like this one young man, Evan. He is a very considerate kind
12-year-old (good-sized) boy and Olivia made the statement, "It's like all fat people are nice!"
I said, "Olivia! That's not very nice. And besides that, you can't say that ALL fat people are nice or ALL of any kind of person are SOMETHING, it's just not true." Meaning that ALL boys don't have smelly feet, or ALL girls don't have long hair, etc. etc.
Then Olivia pipes up "Well, ALL dogs go PEE."
So I was wrong. I hate it that she's smarter than me.

RRROCKY RRROAD?

If you have seen the movie Goonies, then you know how to properly say the title of this blog post "RRRRROCKY RRROAD?"

Wednesday night we had the missionaries for dinner (no we didn't eat the missionaries, we had them OVER for dinner).

I decided to make my Italian Sausage Hamburgers, Sweet Potato Fries, Deviled Egg Salad, and Bubbly Baked Mac n Cheese.

Here is my secret for my hamburgers: I make them like I do meatballs. 1 pound of ground beef, 1 pound of Italian Sausage, 1 cup of crushed up croutons, 1/2 tsp. dried sweet basil, 1/2 tsp. garlic powder. Mix well with your hands and form into hamburger patties, and not some mamsy pamsy patties, I mean massive thick hamburger patties. Now, these can be grilled, but when I get mixed up with the grill, I usually burn things, and since I prefer to actually USE the meat that I cook, instead of feed it to the neighbors dogs, I cooked these bad boys in the oven. About 25 minutes at 425 degrees. I also put them on a broiler pan to catch the drippings instead of letting the burgers swim in grease.

Now, I don't know about you, but often when I boil and peel eggs, they are not particularly pretty. They don't always peel smoothly etc. etc. So I just thought, "Why not mash all those bad boys up in a bowl and throw in the mayo, sweet pickle juice and mustard to make a Deviled Egg Salad?" Works for me!

For my mac and cheese I used some of my FREE 3-minute macaroni noodles (cooked them first, of course) then tossed with a can of Campbell's Cheddar Soup, some shredded Sharp Cheddar, and some butter. Then I poured it into a pan, topped with more cheese and baked until bubbly.

And then there was dessert. I LOVE ROCKY ROAD...so have another triple scoop with me! (That's an old Weird Al Yankovic Song).
Anywho, I made these pudding cookies using the following:
Rocky Road Sandwich Cookies
1 cup softened butter
1/4 cup granulated sugar
3/4 cup brown sugar
1 tsp. vanilla
1 (4 serving size) box of instant chocolate pudding
(Combine those four in large bowl. Beat until smooth.)
Then add
2 eggs
Gradually add:
2 1/4 cups flour
1 tsp. baking soda
Until well combined.
Then stir in 1 (12 oz.) pkg. of mini chocolate chips and 1 cup pecan (chopped or halved)

Bake at 375 for 8-10 minutes.
After cooling completely, sandwich 2 cookies with some marshmallow cream (or Fluff). And there you have it: Rocky Road Sandwich cookies OR Rocky Road Whoopie Cookies.

I LOVE to cook for people (when I'm in the mood). Who wants to come to my house for dinner?!?!?

Hope

Our Sunday School lesson was from the New Testament in John Chapter 7. The people did not believe that Jesus was the Messiah. They said that he deceived the people. They couldn't believe that he was the Christ because he had come from Galilee.
Our instructor asked the question, "Why do you have faith in Jesus Christ and know that he is the Savior?" The class gave the general answers: "Because the scriptures testify of Him...Because the Holy Ghost has born witness to me that He is." I had a thought that I did not share with my class (I have a panic attack when I even raise my hand). But my feelings are that I believe in Christ and know He is my Savior because without Him there is no hope. I know that through the Savior, I can once again be with those whom I have lost. I cling to the hope that Christ gives me and I try to live my life in such a way that through Him this thing can be made possible. There is nothing I want more than to return to His presence along with my family.
I've been thinking a lot lately about how our Heavenly Father places us on earth in family units. It is part of His perfect plan. We are part of a "team" with Him as Captain. We laugh together, weep together, and help each other learn and grow. We love each member of our family so much we can't imagine life without them, and then sometimes we HAVE to experience their absence when the Lord takes them away. We may have loved that person so much that our lives cannot possibly go on without them. But the Lord makes the impossible possible. Sometimes a loss must take place in order for us to progress in this life. Many who have been through severe struggles will admit that they would not be who they are without those conflicts. There are some things that we can ONLY learn by having certain experiences.
I am ever grateful for my Heavenly Father's infinite wisdom and goodness. I am far from where I should be, but I know where it is that I want to go. I HOPE that I can stay focused on the prize.
We will be judged for our words, our works and our thoughts...good or bad:
"Sins do not take care of themselves or simply fade away. Sins do not get 'swept under the rug'. They must be dealt with, and the wonderful thing is that because of the Savior's atoning grace, they can be dealt with..." No bad word, deed or thought is overlooked.
But on the flip side, no act of service is overlooked either.
"No act of obedience, no kindness, and no good deed however small is ever forgotten, and no corresponding blessing is ever withheld."
I want to live my life in such a way that the good deeds outweigh the bad and eventually the bad ones fade away altogether. I do not want to cause pain to my Savior. When I do all within my power to live with hope, His power and love will see me through.
(Words in Quotations came from Elder D. Todd Christofferson)

One small step in toddler-hood...One GIANT leap for mommy

He did it! He did it! Zane has actually started consistently pooping in the toilet. One day, he just decided to go into the bathroom all by himself. A few moments later I hear a yell, "I pooped mom!" I went in to see for myself and then...I cried. I don't think I've ever been so excited to see a turd before! He had done it by himself. No jumping around screaming that his bum or tummy hurt. He just went and did it himself. The next day he did start in with the old routine, and Olivia said "Zane needs to poop again". At first he wasn't going to, but then I said, "Well, that's okay, because I know that when he needs to go, he will just go to the bathroom and do it all by himself because he is a big boy." And he ran down the hall and did his business yet again. This is such a relief (a little play on words). A relief for him and a relief for me! We are so excited to be past that stage.

Now the only problem is that Olivia wants to carry the potty chair (with Zane's deposit) around the house showing everyone. But if I can get the kid who refused to poop...to poop, then I should be able to get her to stop carrying the poop. I told her that while it is very exciting, we are NOT going to show it off.